Doubts and letters

The (so far) youngest member of the family is growing fast. Too fast. Apart from the fact that she has recently lost her 6th tooth and can now read and write (a limited number of words and only in Maltese for now but it still is amazing to behold), she has already started questioning some principles which I would have never dreamt of questioning at her tender age. First off, she’s starting to lose her conviction that I am omniscient and invincible. In her opinion, I don’t know the alphabet (I misplaced the e and wrote it between the i and ie). She also contradicts me on the one matter I feel I really know. Writing. How do you explain to a 5 year old that her mother does know how to write correct Maltese and English and actually corrects other people’s writing and sometimes writes for a living (more on that later)? For her I am the person who gives her cuddles and comforts her when she’s hurt, feeds and dresses her and generally bosses her around. That seems to be all. She doesn’t believe it is possible for that same person to know more than her teacher. I guess I’ll have to wait till she is a mother herself and then we’ll be able to compare notes.

Another thing she is starting to doubt is whether Father Christmas really exists. The reasons why she is doubting are very logical. She is trying to understand how it is that reindeer don’t normally fly but his do. She also doesn’t understand how he can know whether she’s been good or bad. He does live in the North Pole after all. I tried to explain that the reason for all this is magic. I always believed in magic and it never even occurred to me to doubt whether magic was possible. I still believe in magic to this day! On the one hand I was impressed by her intelligence (I blamed it on a higher IQ because it makes me feel better) and on the other it saddened me to think of how different we are. I always lived in a parallel universe in my head. I still refuse to become (totally) jaded and stop believing. She is 5 and is already questioning what to me was fact and it isn’t even because of some stupid cartoon channel she watched because she’s only allowed to watch a couple which are aimed at pre-schoolers.

All is not lost, however. The other day, when we wrote the letter to Father Christmas, we added the Lotta doll she has been pining after for the past few months. I had friends abroad looking for this blessed doll because it was impossible to have it shipped to our island. She told me to make sure to tell my friends to stop looking for her because now she was sure she would get her from Father Christmas. Now that’s my girl!

This is her letter to Father Christmas, transcribed by me. I will explain the reference to toilet paper in another post!

PS – I must publicly thank Josepha of Cup of Crazy Anyone? for bringing Lotta over from the UK. She’s worthy of a Santa’s Little Helper badge!



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  1. Ah that’s sweet mau! I never received one of those before, and probably won’t ever again considering I’ve been waiting for two dolls for my cousin’s daughter since the 24th of November. And they’re now ignoring my emails. Anyhow, she’s doubting Santa already? I remember that being one of the saddest days of my childhood 😦

    • it’s certainly not your fault if the deliveries are late! i only got the snakes and ladders yesterday, almost a month after i ordered it. as for santa, she has moments when logic prevails. she’s not the type to believe blindly. she needs things to make sense first. very unlike her mother!

  2. It’s not my fault true, but I feel somehow responsible. I’ll pop by with the doll at the shop 🙂 Will get my Christmas cards as well cos they’re always the last things I buy!

  3. Wow that is young! I believed in Santa till I was about 9 I think – and then girls at school with older sisters tried to convince me that it’s not true; however, I stuck to my convictions. Then I heard my parents full my stocking. I was sad, but I think I was sadder finding out that the tooth fairy doesn’t exist!

    • i still want to believe to this day! she never doubted the tooth fairy, though she did ask me a few times how the fairy could reach under the pillow for the tooth without getting squashed. the girl favours logic over magic it seems. 😦

  4. Oh no! It seems so young! I will be heart broken when Abby stops believing. I am more excited about Christmas now than I was when I was a kid. Abby and I run around like Lola saying “I can’t wait! I can’t wait! I can’t wait!” Oh, and Lotta is Abby’s favorite too. 🙂

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